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Wolfowitz Unhurt in Baghdad Attack
"Physically unhurt," sniffs Wolfowitz.
No Nuclear Threat Found in Iraq
Not found in Pope's house: matza balls, 'So You've Decided to Become Circumcised' pamphlet.
U.S. Contracts Lift Economy
"Hey, Atlas," says contracts. "Could you hold this for a second while we tie our shoes?"
Pleasantly Perfect Wins Breeders' Cup
'Always Perfect' dives into window of hamburger factory.
Cordless Team, Mouse and Keyboard
Mouse attacked by tiger.
The Best Kind of Corporate Handouts
Thirty seconds in the money machine.
Egyptian Twins Look Each Other in the Eye for the First Time
Ahmed, Mohammed: "Never again will people joke, 'You have something stuck on your head.' "
The Lowdown on Downloads
Satan makes editor consider 'The Lowdown of DownLOWds.' Mini-Satan wins.
Study: Toddlers' Diets Too Fatty
I wish Satan would have won the battle of this headline versus "Fat-ass Toddlers Too Fat-ass."
The reject:
Cordless Team, Mouse and Keyboard
Mouse chokes Starsky, Keyboard bashes Hutch
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