Mr. Edison

“Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls, and it looks like work.”
- Thomas Edison

Okay, Edison is probably right. But after reading this quote, I had an insatiable desire to reanimate his corpse just so I could punch him.

EDISON: “Wha…what? Those lights? I’m alive. Is this the future?”
ME: “Yes it is, Mr. Edison.”
EDISON: “Hmm. By the appearance of your dirty overalls, it seems that you are a farmer, young man.”
ME: “No, granddad. I’m opportunity. And I’ve come to pay you another visit. POW!”
EDISON: “Ouch! Dear heavens, why did you do that?”
ME: “We got a little saying in Opportunity Town. It’s called, “The Early Bird Gets The Fist In The Face.” BA-BAM!
EDISON: “Oh, my! Everything is growing dark.”
ME: “Sounds like you need 100 watts of fist.” [EDISON slumps down on ground. I pull out a cigar and light it by striking it across my face.]
ME: “Edison. You’re Edi-DONE.” [laugh uproariously until credits roll.]

I need counseling.