Cybersquatter of the Day Update #2

I'm going to hell...I sent this email a few minutes ago (background here).

"TED LEONSIS IS A DICK!!!!

J. here again. I used my hotmail account so my boss wouldn’t find out my birthday surprise to the big guy. (The security department pervs here monitor all our email. One of the guys there is a real ASSAOLe: Always Ogling Ladies email.)

It turns out they were monitoring my Hotmail too! My boss gets my email to you guys and forwards it to Ted Leonsis (DICK!!!).

Then the dude calls me in his office! I’m expecting him to smack me down some happy rays for planning the surprise gift for him, But he looks all mad and constipated, like when the Caps lose. He says,

“Why were you planning on buying me, ‘www.igotmail.net’?”

“You know, cause it’s like ‘You got mail’ but better, because it’s you. I mean, I.”

He gets up and leans forward on his arms. “I make $55 million dollars a year. If I need a crappy domain name from a marginally talented ass-kisser, I’ll buy it myself.”

See? Complete DICK. He doesn’t even make sense. He can’t kiss his own ass.

If you’re wondering why I’m writing this at work from my hotmail account, it’s because I QUIT! Go ahead James, forward it to Mr. Leonsis. Forward it to the whole company. I don’t care. You’re worse than Sheryl and my good-for-nothing dog. And I slept with your wife.

LEONSIS, I hope Ollie the Goalie gets Colie Cancer.

So I guess I can’t buy the domain name, but I hope you have good luck selling it…TO SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T WORK AT AOL.

Later,
Jason

P.S. Are you guys hiring? I’m really good at software programming. You know the AOL icon of the little person running? I wrote a script that makes him do jumping jacks."