This isn't the beginning of a financial advice column on how to scrimp and save your way to being a millionaire. This is the beginning of a column, and possibly on-going series, on how to annoy your roommate with pennies.
When I got home, I saw some pennies on my drawer. I dislike pennies. They're like herpes: never around when you need them, and always there when you don't. Okay, that's nothing like herpes. There's a cure for herpes. But there's no cure for pennies.
There's no cure for herp--
Shut up. I read it on Wikipedia. Anyway, I saw the spare change and had a though that has occurred to many, if not most, of my readers: how can I use these to annoy my roommate?
I decided to see how many pennies I would have to throw at her door before she opened it to investigate the sound. My hypothesis is that it would take three pennies thrown intervals of 10-15 seconds before she opened the door and screamed at me, assuming I didn't run into my room and pretend to be sleeping when I saw her door crack opened.
The equipment was simple: me, pennies. The procedure was simple as well: Throw penny. Wait. Giggle. Repeat.
Result: It took four pennies. On the third penny, I knew I was close, because I heard her exclaim, "What is that?" The fourth penny did the trick. As a bonus, I no longer had four pennies.
Conclusion: There were several factors that contributed to my roommate opening her door after four pennies. One, pennies hitting a door make a loud and unnatural sound. Two, my roommate is smart and curious, making her disposed to investigate unusual sounds. Three, my roommate was unfortunately awake pre-experiment, shortening the length of this innovative excursion into the realm of psychology.
In case there are any science goobers out there, I know this isn't a real experiment. It can't be repeated. The best I can do is throw pennies at my other roommate's door, but she lives around the corner and down a long hall. That's why experiment #2 will measure the correlation between scream volume and #of Cheez-whip topped pennies on well-trained rats.
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4 comments:
jason, you just royally screwed yourself. I found those effing pennies in my boots this morning, and i will seek revenge. let the penny war begin.
(i do believe that whoever loses Penny War owes the winner dinner. Prepare to cook me a meal, YET AGAIN! HAHAHAHAHHAHA!)
Hee hee hee. That was a good one. I put them there a week ago and had to resist hinting about it.
I do not accept the terms of Penny War. It's going to turn into the Israel/PLO situation. By the end, we're going to hate each other too much to cook a non-posionus dinner for each other.
nice tactic. you're just scared... methinks a little gun shy after the last time you risked it all on a dinner bet? hehehe.
Do you really want to start a war with someone with twice as much free time as you? Think about it for a minute. Guess who's home now? Me. Guess who's not? You. This is true 6 out of 7 days of the week. And on the 7th day, I'm out buying pennies.
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