...from Fox's 101 Things Removed from the Human Body special:
"He was a miracle. But he was a miracle with a pole stuck through his head."
Another good one: "He went to his doctor, complaining about constipation." (It turns out the guy somehow ate dozens of rusty nails.) What was that doctor-patient conference like?
DOCTOR: "Jerry, I have some bad news. We found out what is causing your stomach pains and constipation."
PATIENT: "What is it? Rotten fish? An ulcer? Low-fiber diet?
DOCTOR: "Actually, according to the chart [glances at chart] it appears to be A BOX OF FUCKING NAILS."
PATIENT: "Oh, yeah... The nails. Kind of makes sense, now that you--"
DOCTOR: "YOU IDIOT, WHY DID YOU EAT NAILS? NOT NAIL. NAILS. YOU ATE MULTIPLE NAILS. AFTER YOU ATE ONE NAIL, YOU DECIDED TO HAVE SEVERAL OTHERS. LIKE IT WAS A SNACK PACK. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?"
PATIENT: "Um, too much iron?"
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