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Misc.
- If New York were invaded by a giant race of ants, and someone looked at the invasion from the top of a skyscraper, it would look just like a lot of ants attacking a lot of other ants.
"Who's winning?"
"I'm not sure. Which side has the ray guns?
- One of the dogs I am taking care of over the weekend greeted me this afternoon with a pile of watery poop on the carpet. The one good thing about cleaning a dog's poop (and there is only one good thing) is that it makes other chores a lot easier. Like cleaning the bathroom. "Hey, my roommate didn't poop on the floor. Awesome!"
- You know you're really rich when you can poop like a dog: on the carpet and have someone else pick it up.
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