If God Were One of Us

Match.com could save itself a lot of money and work. The company spends tens of thousands of dollars advertising their site, hiring models for photos, analyzing web traffic, tracking customer activity, and creating promotions to defend its claim of the online dating world. And they could. get rid of it all and double their popularity just by advertising one of their little-known features. The feature?

Search. By. Mullet.

In addition to wind-tossed, teased, and curled, you can elect to receive page after page of potential dates with swept-back manes that will intoxicate your soul and provide wind resistance during blustery storms.

Match.com could spend 30 seconds a year creating advertising materials. "Are we rolling? No, screw it. One take. I'm Larry Abrahms, CEO of Match.com. I'll make this short and sweet. You can search by mullet. You wanna spend 2 years developing mulletseekingmullet.com, be my guest. But for now, you got two choices. Food Lion or Match.com. I'm out."

Search by mullet. Search by mullet. Search by mullet!

Update: As Anonymous pointed out, the links don't work. Which sucks, because one of them was a contender for best mullet ever, and I can't remember which area I searched to find him. So if you want to cull the mulls, you'll have to search on Match.com yourself.